30 Days of Submission. Day's 25 to 30.

Hey everyone! I hope you all are having a good week! My fever has finally broke and I am feeling *mostly* human today! Thank you for all the get better comments on my last post! I've missed the last days of 30 days of submission here - so going to do
 them all in at once here to get caught up.

Day 24: What are the emotions that most directly let you access submission? What feelings do they inspire?

Comfort - security - peace - excitement - freedom. Enough said. 

Day 25: Are there items, objects or rituals that represent or help you express submission? If not, have you ever thought of adding or being gifted one? Is there a special significance to these objects or rituals?

Sir has bought me several collars and cuffs. Some are formal, some are every day, some are for play sessions. I at all times have at least one of them on, but usually two - one on my ankle, and whichever I am told to wear on my neck. I feel naked without them - and not in a fun way... more in the, crap I just woke up in the middle of school naked kind of way. 

Day 26: What are the qualities you seek in a dominant partner and why? Are some qualities deal-breakers as in “must” haves or “must not” have?

Confidence. Strength. A good personality. A sense of humor etc. It's really the same qualities you look for in a partner for a lot of subs.

Day 27: Do you have submissive desires or fantasies that you have yet to be able to explore? Do some of your desires confuse or frighten you? Do they excite you?

Hmm. We've explored most of them. I cannot think of any we haven't explored. Hm.

Day 28: Has your submission ever let you down? Have you ever been criticized for your submission? Have you ever regretted being or feeling submissive in a moment or in a relationship? Have you ever looked back and realized you made a mistake and how did you handle your submission going forward from that.

Why would my submission let me down? No. Criticized? No. Regretted being or feeling submissive? Again, no. Realized I made a mistake? Who doesn't make mistakes? Dom, sub.. vanilla, kink. We're all human, we all make mistakes. When I make a mistake in my submission, I go to my Doms and ask for guidance, if discipline/punishment etc. is needed, that is up to them. Some of these questions have really boggled me, and like this one , I feel like I am missing something in the question. o.O

 

Day 29: Is pain or humiliation (spankings for example) a part of your submission? What is your relationship to it? Do you embrace it as a part of your submission, tolerate it as necessary or have some other type of relationship with it?

I deal with pain on a daily basis being a chronic pain patient. My pain tolerances are extremely high with all the surgeries I have had to have. To try and explain how pain is part of my submission would be... difficult, to say the least. I see and feel different types of pains, and relate them to different things. Pain from spankings even, fall into different categories for me. Pleasure - I am, despite my spinal disorder/surgeries, a masochist. Spanking for pleasure turns me on, big time. As well as other types of play that can deal with pain, knife play, etc. Spankings as discipline and punishment fall into pain in a bad way. It's more harsh/hard and strict. It falls into a different area of my brain/body that I know I am in trouble or being disciplined, and is very effective. It's all in the reasons behind the spanking.

Humiliation is a big part of D/s for a lot of Doms and subs - for us, it's not a huge factor in our dynamics. I find it arousing, though - if done right and you're in the right state of mind for it.  


Day 30: Is your need to submit being met? If not, or if your situation changed, do you think that you could continue in your life and still be happy/content if you were never able to express your submission in the way that feels best to you again? What makes submission special to you?

My needs are fully met. Would I be happy if I were not able to express my submission? No. 
Submission is special in a thousand and one ways. For a lot of people, like myself - it's a huge part of who and what we are. It's freedom in a way that is hard to put into words.